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I sat down yesterday in front of my old but trusty piano, positioning my fingers above the keys. My back was straight, with one foot stretched and resting gently on the sustain pedal, the other curled under the seat. I glanced back up at the music in front of me, then pressed those fingers down.

Nothing.

Sure, sound was emanating from the piano, but it wasn't anything like how I used to play the song. A few chords in and my mind went blank. What was going on?

I tried, again and again, to resuscitate the dying spark that was once beautiful piano playing. I studied the music. I tapped a few uncooperating keys. But it seemed to be gone. I had once played this song with ease, almost being able to do it with my eyes closed if it weren't so complicated. But now the notes wafting on the air were nothing but a memory.

I stood up and walked around, berating myself for not having caressed those ivory keys in a long while. Maybe it's too hot in here, I thought, so I changed clothes to no avail. Those keys were mad at me, all 88 of them, and they were determined to see me fail.

The worst thing a pianist can do is think about what they're doing.

The realization hit like a warm summer rain: surprising yet refreshing. I'd been spending so much time thinking that I'd forgotten to just let my fingers do what they do best.

I took my glasses off. If I couldn't see the sheet music, I couldn't try to read it. I closed my eyes, tilted my head back, and took a deep breath, positioning my fingers atop those lovely worn keys for one last try.

And it happened. Not immediately, because I still wanted to think. My brain didn't want to surrender to my fingers. And every time I messed up, I knew it was the battle between my brain and my fingers. But after a few tries, and almost without realizing it, I had played the song every bit as fluidly, clearly, and soulfully as I did months ago. Unable to believe it, I played it again, and almost surprised myself with the dramatic crescendos and sustains and suspenseful pauses that I seemed to automatically inject from place to place.

Then I picked up momentum and switched from the powerful song I had just played to a more subtle song. I had worried earlier with this one as well because I couldn't even remember how the song went, much less think about starting it. My first few tries were threatening...my brain, sensing the new opportunity to take control, once again fought my fingers but lost. By the third try I had it and I could feel the energy surging from my fingertips. My eyes were closing and I began to sway with the music, pressing the keys as if I were dancing. Before I was quite ready to end the experience, the song ebbed away on its final soft notes.

And for those few seconds while I sat there, the last note still echoing in my head, heart pounding, everything was perfect.

Addicted to Caffeine??

I realized Wednesday that in just a few weeks of drinking coffee everyday I've gotten myself addicted.

Wednesday was the day I went cold turkey for the day. That was the worst mistake I could have ever made. I was evil all morning and carried my bad attitude through the rest of the day, ending up going home and sleeping from 7 at night until 6 in the morning.

Thursday I drank my extra large hazelnut coffee from Dunkin Donuts like I had been trekking in a desert for hours on end. It tasted so good and so perfect. I was actually craving the drink.

I almost didn't get coffee today because my heart was already fluttering from a long night. I felt uneasy and anxious. But as I wrote my review for the iPhone, I realized I couldn't torture myself any longer and ran for the nearest Starbucks for a venti caramel frappuchino with a shot of espresso. YUM.

It may be crazy, but the first sip I took instantly calmed me down. I was mellowed and ready to go back to researching. I swear even the sun seemed to shine a little brighter.

Apparently if I don't have some coffee by 8 in the morning I'm doomed to have a bad day.

Add "caffeine addiction" to the list of things that just isn't the same anymore.

O Say, Can You Sleep and Text At The Same Time?

Wouldn't the world be nice if we could multitask sleep?

Yes, I fit the typical "busy American in a big city" stereotype. I walk down the street using as many electronic devices as I can carry while sipping my coffee. I eat, drive and text at the same time. I talk on the phone and watch South Park while painting my nails. Even right now I'm writing this blog post, eating yogurt, and texting Amardo, all while I'm technically "at work".

There is only one thing in the world you cannot multitask, though, and it's sleep.

Not to say that I've never tried.

I've tried sleeping while working, eating while sleep, watching TV sleep, and even texting or talking on the phone while sleep. I should mention that in these instances I don't mean I tried doing these things while in REM sleep...I mean when you're at that delicate spot between truly sleep and awake.

I can type while in this sleep limbo, and the sentences make sense as sentences, but the idea is completely alien. I fell asleep eating once, only to wake up, take a bite, fall back asleep, and continue this process until I had finally finished eating. Although I'm not sure if that qualifies as a sleep-eating attempt or is just a stunning reminder of just how much of a fatass I am :).

The funniest sleep multitasking attempt I make, though, is my attempt to text while sleep. Because of my ability to type with my eyes closed or focused elsewhere (which is why it's so easy for me to fall asleep while typing), I was under the false impression that I could send a text message while sleep. Let's just say being in that dreamy state between sleep and awake+acrylic nails+a failing space bar do not an intelligent text make.

Sleep is supposed to relax and refresh the body, so I suppose it's a good thing we can't do anything while sleeping. Then again, I'm one of those people who finds sleep a disposable thing in light of doing other, more enjoyable things.

I'll bet humans millions of years from now will evolve into creatures that can multitask while they're sleeping, because we spend so much time trying to do it now.

Lucky bastards.

Stop The Abuse or I'll Hit You

A study has shown that teenagers, and even children as young as 11, should be educated on abusive dating relationships.

Don't get me wrong, I agree that children should be educated about these types of relationships. But is education enough?

What these "experts" need to realize is that you can educate all you want but education alone won't do the trick. You have to factor in family backgrounds, environments, peer influences, the media, and all sorts of other things.

You can't teach someone how to avoid an abusive relationship because one can't exactly spot an abusive person from a mile away. Abusive people are very good at not looking abusive.

Teaching adolescents how to know if they're in an abusive relationship can be helpful, but that's like telling someone they have cancer without giving them any remedy options. And typically, the advice given to people who think they are in abusive relationships is to get away from it, to tell someone else or the authorities, etc., etc. This backfires because much of an abusive relationship is built upon fear. There is a reason someone being abused doesn't go to the authorities; the fear of the repercussions of that action far outweigh the fear of any abuse they are already suffering.

The only thing that can prevent abusive relationships is if people learn to respect each other. This is, of course, easier said than done.

Or you can always teach people my favorite quote: If you hit me, you'd better knock me the FUCK out because if you don't and I get back up I'm killing you.

Kind of negates the whole "abuse" thing, though.

Tuesday Daisy and Friday Daffodil...and no I'm not talking about days or flowers

Nicole Kidman gave birth to her first child with Keith Urban today, and following in the footsteps of so many celebrities before her, she named her child something you'd have to be high to appreciate: Sunday Rose Kidman Urban. Sunday Rose?




The rush for celebrities to name their children unique names has created a bandwagon in itself, almost so that the more unique the name the more of a follower you seem to be. Where have all the traditional names gone, and when can we have them back?

I'm not one to talk about unique names; my own name (Demiera) is one that you're not likely to find anywhere, especially not with the same spelling. The one thing I will say about my name is that it's actually a name...my mom didn't name me after the fruit she craved when she was pregnant (I couldn't walk around with a name like Banana) and she didn't name me after a number (can you imagine being named something like...One?) and she certainly didn't find as many common words as possible and throw them together to make what she thinks is nice, like Rain Summer Fresh.

Some "baby name expert" (because, of course, in this harsh world, you'll always need some random woman to tell you whether or not YOU properly named YOUR baby that YOU created) fawned over Sunday Rose, saying that it meant serenity. What exactly is so serene about a Sunday Rose that isn't just as serene on a Monday or Tuesday?

And might I add that "Kidman Urban" don't really allow for a fluid, peaceful name like "Sunday Rose"?

I certainly hope Sunday Rose upholds the serenity her name has pronounced for her because if not I vote her name be changed to Monday Thorn. It would certainly be more fitting.

"Sunday Rose" may be an adorable name for a fat happy baby but it kind of destines the child for Hippie-dom later in life. We'll see how that goes.

More Evidence that T-Mobile is THE Mobile Service

Ever since December of 2007, I've been a T-Mobile customer, and since then I've had nothing but glowing reviews to give. T-Mobile outranks all the rest in many aspects, but it's strong point is customer service.

I have YET to have a bad experience with a T-Mobile customer service representative. Every single one, from the time I started my service until today, has been absolutely nothing but polite and more than willing to solve my problems (and I call often). Whether I'm reporting a problem with my phone or billing or service, they are on call and always seem to have an answer to my issue. When I called to upgrade my text messages from 500 to unlimited, I got 200 extra texts free to last until the end of the month. When I was trying to use a Cingular phone with my T-Mobile sim card and had to call back at least 3 different times, they gave me everything I needed and if they didn't know the answer they wouldn't give up until they'd found it (Might I add, I called AT&T that day as well and neither customer service rep was as cheery and customer-driven as the ones at T-Mobile).

But today was truly miraculous. I called earlier to switch my rate plan from the unlimited messaging plan to the Sidekick plan, which everyone knows is absolutely necessary to optimize the whole Sidekick experience, and the customer service rep was wonderful. He told me that for being the nicest customer he's had all day, I would get 100 minutes added to my plan for free. Not that I really needed the extra minutes, but it was a nice gesture and of course I appreciated it.

However, when I checked my bill balance, I found that it was almost $100. Surprised (ya'll should know by now I don't take kindly to surprise expenses), I called back immediately. The rep i spoke to now told me that when you switch a rate plan, you have to pay two months in advance, which explained the high cost of the bill. What I didn't know was that if you get a rate plan switched and you don't pay for it when you switch it, your service gets suspended! Had I not checked and then called to inquire, I would have lost service at midnight (which might have changed my tone about T-Mobile just a little bit). For the inconvenience, the rep deducted a month of Sidekick service that I would have had to pay in advance (saving me almost $25), which means I get a month of Sidekick service for free.

T-Mobile truly cares about the customer, and as I said before, they have always found an answer to my questions or a solution to my problem, no matter how many problems I have or questions to answer. T-Mobile need not worry about losing this customer any time soon.

Keep Your Orders to Yourself!

I walked into Starbucks this morning, anticipating a delicious venti caramel macchiato with an extra shot of espresso. As is usual for a location amid three trains and as many buses, it was pretty full. The barista was asking for orders all the way down the line, and even though I was fourth in line, she asked for my order. Drawing a deep breath, I had to shout venticaramelmacchiatowithanextrashotandwhippedcream across the room.

I hate having to shout things across the room, especially if I'm ordering. Can you imagine the horror of having to shout your order, say, at a pharmacy?

"I'd like a morning after pill."
"I'm here to pick up my herpes medication."
"I need a tube of Preparation H." (haaaa)

And what if I were being a wimp today and ordered a hot chocolate? Can you imagine the whispers I'd get from customers? No, when you go in Starbucks you have to be on your A-game. You can't let the business people in their suits who always seem pressed for time outdo you. Your macchiato is just as important as their lowfat vanilla chai.

*****

I was sitting on the train one day and overheard a woman talking with her friend. They somehow breached the subject of Starbucks coffee, and I perked my ears.

Voulez vouz coucher avec moi?

It became obvious after just a few moments which was the "once every two weeks" Starbucker and which was the "I might as well own this place" person. She even had her very own "foreign order", which is what I've dubbed those orders spoken so fast the barista would think you weren't even speaking in English. There was less coffee ordering in her string of syllables, however, than there was in size specification, milk specification, and whether or not to have whipped cream or sugar. She couldn't even take whole milk or 2%; she had to ask for yucky skim. Eeeeyuck. You might as well have just asked for water.

But then again, "water" just doesn't sound as spectacular.

My Thoughts