Saturday, September 19, 2009

Time For Change

I've come to the executive decision that I need to change a couple of things in my life. Starting with this blog appearance. It's been with this blue deal for quite some time (I don't even remember when I did this) and I'm getting kind of tired of it. I want my blog to reflect that I am a writer, that I express myself through the use of words, and also to reflect my personality. This dark makes me depressed, doesn't really capture my attention.

And you know a blog needs a makeover if it doesn't capture the blogowner's attention anymore.

I also want to make writing more a part of my every day life, like it used to be. I've noticed with my job and living with someone, I haven't spent enough reflective time with myself, re-evaluating the decisions I make on a day-to-day basis and just pouring out those feelings and emotions I'm not comfortable expressing in any form other than writing.

To be completely honest, blogging became a chore, which is why I haven't done it. I forgot the true reason behind me starting this thing in the first place: as an outlet. A place where I can basically tell-all without restraint, a place where I don't need to hide or wear a mask to hide who I really am. Yes, most people use the Internet to become someone they're not...I'm using the Internet to find out who I really am.

I'm not going to hold myself to a blogging schedule...never have. Any writer, producer, or creative talent knows that inspiration comes when it's ready, not when you force it. My other blog, Cellulary Extraordinary (which I thought had some real potential when I started it) became a chore because I wanted to keep it updated every day. I forced myself to devote time to it. But when something comes from within, and you truly enjoy it, you don't force yourself to do it. You just do it.

I'm also going to start up writing my novel again, a dream I've literally held on to since about the 5th grade. I originally wanted to be one of the youngest authors to write a novel and got pretty damn close more than once too. But I always gave up. I threw 100+ page manuscripts away without a second thought. So as I've promised a long time ago, I'm going to start it up again. And I'm going to share passages with you. Critique them, read them, guide me, whatever.

And in addition to all of this, I plan on starting to write poems again.

Part of this is a result of me not being in school and not wanting to lose the knowledge I've got, at least until I start back again. I also realize that I'm becoming *slightly* dumbed down by all of the television I watch and video games I play and magazines I read. So on my next shopping trip, instead of buying shoes and clothes and hair stuff, I'm gonna buy some books. I need to start reading again.

The change sounds radical, but I'm excited...I need this. I need to get focused again on what I'm trying to do with myself and where I'm trying to go in life.

For now, though, I'm off to find new designs for the blog... :)

5 comments:

One Eighteen said...

Demi, Demi... I'm really happy for you, Ima let you finish but...

YOU STARTED THIS BLOG CUZ OF ME!!!

118

Video Vix[o]n said...

Mz. Common Sense... you've come a long way, but happy to see that you're getting focused...

believe me... sometimes I think we all forget why we started blogging and something happens where we bounce back... i could tell by this new loook you mean biz...

and i'm officially handing you the copyright to "Mz. Common Sense" to you... my gift to you...

IntrospectiveGoddess said...

Hello fellow chicagoian. I agree with just submitting yourself to the creative process, no schedules. I had to step away from my blog for awhile because I felt like I wasnt able to express myself freely but I'm back to my writing and it feels good. Good luck with school trying to go back myself!

eunice said...

Helloooo! long time no see! Is this your latest template design? It's nice, and I like the search bar! :D

Mz. Common Sense said...

@118 - ...LMAO.

@V Dub - Awww I get the copyright?? Thank you! All original credits still go to you though for originally inventing it. And I agree...we all kind of have a blogging epiphany and then we can continue writing!

@Introspective Goddess - Hey there Chicagoan! Good luck to you too with the school thing...it's tough!

@eunice - Thank you! Yes this is the new design :) I'm very happy with it. It's much easier to read and a little more reflective of who I am!