Sunday, March 23, 2008

Different Day, Same Shit

...That's one of my favorite quotes. My mom has a shirt with Calvin and Hobbes that says it...she won't let me wear it, though, because of the profanity. I think it's absolutely hilarious. And the quote is so true...

Here I am, in my normal spot on Amardo's bed, about to do my normal bit of procrastination before I jump into doing some homework. Actually, the fact that I'm blogging in the first place shows that I'm trying to put off doing my work. It's not like I'm really doing anything else right now, either.

Oh yeah...Happy Easter everyone! ...That's for all the people who still consider Easter a holiday. Personally, since I was young, Easter never turned out to be much more than just another day. I stopped decorating eggs so long ago I barely would remember how to do it now. I haven't gotten a fancy Easter basket in years, not that it mattered anyway because I could never eat the candy inside...My aunt bought me a basket a few years ago but it wasn't like the big one, it was more of a gift bag type of thing. It was still cute. But gone are the days when I used to go out for Easter (not that there were very many). We used to dress up and go to church for Easter...I won't even do that now. My mom used to cook...back when she used to cook...but now Auntie Wanie does more of that. I'm still in Dekalb, though, and honestly, the word "Easter" no longer holds any true value to me. It's just an excuse for kids to get lots of candy and stupid toys and for my aunt to have to cook dinner for the girls. I'm not terribly religious, so I don't really celebrate the religious aspect of the holiday. Take away the candy, the dinner, and the religion, and what do you have?? Exactly. Just another day.

Unfortunately, this brings to mind the lack of excitement I feel when Christmas comes around. Think about it: my mom hasn't gotten me a Christmas present in quite a while, so I don't expect anything from her. Half the family doesn't even come to the Christmas dinner anymore, and until this year it's not like I had anything to do at the dinner anyway. I got a lot of money, which of course I was thankful for, but that's basically all Christmas means to me. We didn't even have a stupid tree decorated. We don't really have a legitimate Christmas tree, either. When I was young, my mom would assemble our huge ass 6 ft. tree, then my grandmother and I would decorate it with ornaments, icicles, lights, and angel hair (angel hair is the worst, though, it's so pretty but it itches!!). Then we would turn off the lights in the living room and turn on the lights on the tree. I would get a book and sit right by the tree, almost underneath it, enjoying the warmth of the house and the excitement having a tree would bring.

But what's the point of having a tree if no presents will go under it? And after a while, that's what started to happen. The living room would be filled with boxes and toys. Then, it stopped. Soon, Christmas became so predictable that I didn't need to wrap anything, and neither did anyone else. Then we got to the point we're at now, where Christmas has just become another day.

Do we all go through this cycle? Do holidays remain magical just for the first couple of years of a child's life, only to be depressingly squashed when they reach a certain age? Is this really what children have to look forward to? And then do we, as adolescents, just watch the time go past until we are the parents, telling the same magical lies to our own children, buying the same gifts, convincing them that bunnies hiding dyed eyes exist and that a fat man will break into the house to leave them presents? Why lie to your children when they are young if they will only be disappointed later?? Sure, it's cute to tell them that a mystic fairy will give them money if they leave their teeth under their pillow, but what happens when the mystic fairy loses her job or overdraws on her bank account? What happens when Santa's house gets foreclosed and he can't afford to buy little kids toys anymore?

When the gifts are gone, the relatives are old, and everything is said and done, holidays become nothing but just a ordinary day spent remembering when they used to be extraordinary.

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